Friday, October 17

What are you going to be for Halloween?

I'm going to be a witch. Just like every other day. But I'm going to wear a special hat.

Nate and Heidi are planning a truly fucked up Halloween spectacular. Zombie bride and groom.
That's right. brother and sister, bride and groom. I'm totally gonna let them.

I'm doing the make-up and costumes- I'm inspired from this Zombie Hotness:


Chloe is going to be a fairy/pixie/woodland princess. She's got little sparkle wings, and that's the whole point.

FYI: Today is Nate's birthday. He's 11. He weighed 11 pounds when he was born. At 11 in the morning. I love him so much. He's so awesome and inspiring. Here he is pickin peaches in the orchard this summer:


Happy birthday Baby. You are my favorite boy in the whole world.

Thursday, October 16

The Post you have all been waiting for....

He's out.

He signed the lease on his ridiculously expensive apartment and spent the there night last night.

I got a call from him about 10:30pm, and it went something like this:

T: I got in and everything looks great. They got my accent wall painted a nice rust red color. You'll really like it. You and the kids will have to come up this weekend and I'll give you the tour.

Me: That's great.

T: Chloe's room is huge. She has her own bathroom and a big closet.

Me: That's great.

T: I haven't really unpacked much, cause I don't have any furniture yet.

Me: I know. Did you get you air mattress set up?

T: *long pause* It's a camping mattress.

Me: I know. You told me that. It came with an air pump right? You can use that to inflate it.

T: *yet another long pause* The air pump has to charge for 12 hours before it will work.

Me: *long pause to stifle laughter* So, you can't inflate the mattress?

T: No, not until tomorrow morning.

Me: Well, they say that the floor is good for your back.

Can I get a Karma Whoop Whoop?

Sunday, October 12

I have discovered these things:

I really am bothered by anklets under pantyhose.

I prefer pants that require no button or zipper to pull down. I will wear jeans, but they have to be able to slip off.

The Dirt Mall is the best place ever. I could have bought a used set of tires, a Chinese umbrella and a Pomeranian puppy all in the same place. I would not, however, buy the eye-color-changing-contacts (only 15 bucks!) or the pseudo-gold and diamond-esque 'Grillz' ala Flavor Flav (also.... you guessed it, 15 bucks!). I draw the line with things that go into my body. That included the food. No Dirt Mall food.

I am trying to trudge thru The Mists of Avalon. Somebody lied to me. Yeah, it's technically good, I like the different viewpoint, but jeez. It is taking me forever. I read books like they are on fire and my eyes shoot water but this little fucker has me almost dreading to crack it open. It's been downgraded to a bathroom reader. I've got to finish the Twilight books instead before the damn movie comes out.

Here's a gratuitous boob/cake shot. I made it for Kelly's bachelorette party. I love the little boobie chocolates. Multicultural. I'm an equal opportunity boob aficionado.

Wednesday, October 8

Oh Horror!

Conversation with Nate:

N- Dad got a Webkinz bat! Guess what he named it!

Me- (totally distracted with reading) I have no idea. Tell me.

N- Lovecraft. What does Lovecraft mean?

Me (putting down book) What? He named it Lovecraft? Really? HP Lovecraft was a famous author who wrote some really great horror stories about bizarre monsters. Call of Chthulu, At the Mountains of Madness, Dream Quest of the Unknown Kadath; These are great! (In my head, I'm trying to remember how old I was when I read these. 13? 12? Is he old enough to dive into bizarro horror or will I fuck him up forever and make him into a lil' serial killer?)

N- HP Lovecraft? HP? His name was HP?

Me- Yep.

N- I bet it was short for 'hit points'.



best.nerd baby.evehYeah. He's getting the box set for Yule.

My people


This is the kind of thing that keeps my hopes alive. These are my people. These are my ancestors. We live now in America, the big culturally androgynous melting pot where nearly no one has a distinct grasp on their family's historical roots. Sure, you can trace back 3, 4, or 5 generations; But where do your people come from? Why do you have the characteristics that you do?

I envy other cultures with a firm grip on their heritage.